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Dumb Criminals
A satirical article had a headline that read as follows: Burglar sues homeowner after being raped by German shepherds while stuck in the pet door for the house.

Did a Burglar Sue a Homeowner After Being Raped by German Shepherds While Stuck in a Dog Door?

Written by:
Jordan Liles
Jan 23, 2023 According to the story, the burglar sued for $850,000 in damages. But did this really happen?
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Did a Burglar Snort Dried Sperm, Contracting Syphilis and Herpes?

Written by:
Nur Ibrahim
Dec 13, 2022 A stomach-churning variation of a classic "dumb criminal" tale.
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Gang Member Gold Plates Genitals, Dies

Written by:
Dan Evon
Jun 23, 2015 A titillating story about a man who killed himself by dipping his testicles into molten gold cam ...
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Disappearing Ink on Check

Written by:
Barbara Mikkelson
Oct 21, 2010 A pair of scammers attempted to pass checks written in disappearing ink?
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Slow-Driving Doper

Written by:
Barbara Mikkelson
Jan 7, 2008 Doper trying to avoid police attention is pulled over for driving far under the speed limit.
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Gun Shop Robber

Written by:
Barbara Mikkelson
Mar 25, 2005 Thief who tries to rob a gun shop is shot dead by those in the store.
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The Self-Signaling Swag

Written by:
Barbara Mikkelson
Jan 6, 2003 Crooks are fingered by electronic locators contained in the items they steal.
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Cremains Mistaken for Cocaine

Written by:
Barbara Mikkelson
May 7, 2001 Thieves steal 'cocaine' which turns out to be the cremated remains of a householder's relative.
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'Frozen Brain' Shoplifter

Written by:
Barbara Mikkelson
Feb 17, 2001 Did a shoplifter who stashed a frozen chicken under her hat die of 'frozen brain'?
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Drunk Takes Police Car

Written by:
Barbara Mikkelson
Dec 31, 1998 Drunk mistakenly takes a police car and parks it in his garage.
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Criminals Accidentally Dial 911

Written by:
Barbara Mikkelson
Dec 31, 1998 Criminals accidentally dial 911 and turn themselves in?
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