[Collected on the Internet, 2001]
The following sign was posted in the front window of a local Brooklyn neighborhood business.
WE WOULD RATHER DO BUSINESS WITH 1000 ARABS THAN WITH ONE JEW
[Collected on the Internet, 2003]
A sign at a business establishment in Philadelphia, PA:
"WE WOULD RATHER DO BUSINESS WITH 1000 AL QAEDA TERRORISTS THAN WITH A SINGLE AMERICAN"
This sign was prominently displayed in the window of a business in Philadelphia. You are probably outraged at the thought of such an inflammatory statement. One would think that anti-hate groups from all across the country would be marching on this business... And that the National Guard might have to be called to keep the angry crowds back. But, perhaps in these stressful times one might be tempted to let the proprietors simply make their statement
You may ask what kind of business would dare post such a sign? (look below)
Answer: A Funeral Home
(Who said morticians had no sense of humor?)
- Current e-mail versions claim this of an unnamed business either in Philadelphia or one of the boroughs of New York City, but the story could be localized to any city or town.
As a joke, the "one Jew" tale is less obvious than the two howlers just mentioned because its punchline is often omitted. Lacking its tagline, this bit of humor could be misinterpreted as a blatant display of anti-Semitism on the part of some unnamed shopkeeper. The intent should be obvious in the full version, however:
WE WOULD RATHER DO BUSINESS WITH 1000 TERRORISTS THAN WITH ONE JEW.
GOLDBERG'S FUNERAL HOME
The name of the mortuary (Goldberg's or Goldstein's are most commonly given) provides additional motivation for the expression of this particular sentiment — someone of that surname is presumed to be Jewish and thus especially anti-terrorist (since all terrorists are assumed to be Arabs these days) and pro-Jew. The message is therefore the reverse of what it first appears to be — it's pro-Jewish.
As for the
Confused, the priest asks, "Sir, why on earth would you want to become a Catholic when you've lived all your life a Jew?"
"Better one of them should die than one of us!" the man snaps.
Previous incarnations of this tale set the action in a concentration camp in Nazi Germany during WWII. In those tellings, prisoners are offered improved conditions if they volunteer to work for the Germans. One man steps forward and announces he'd rather work for a hundred Germans than one allied soldier. Naturally, he turns out to be an undertaker.
Barbara "rasp buried" Mikkelson
Last updated: 7 April 2008