Claim:   Iraqi woman in an American grocery store who disdains America's bombing of her country is told off by another patron.

Status:   Undetermined.

Example:   [Collected via e-mail, 2003]

One of my dear sons serves in the military. I'm a very proud Mom. He is still stateside here in California. He called me yesterday to let me know how warm and welcoming people were to him and his troops everywhere he goes. Telling me how people shake their hands, and thank them for being willing to serve and fight, for not only our own freedoms, but so that others may have them also. But he also told me about an incident in the grocery store where he stopped yesterday, on his way home from the base. He said that ahead of several people in front of him stood a woman dressed in a burkha. He said when she got to the cashier she loudly remarked about the U.S. flag lapel pin the cashier wore on her smock. The cashier reached up and touched the pin, and said, "Yes, I always wear it." The woman in the burkha then asked the cashier when she was going to stop bombing her countrymen, explaining that she was an Iraqi. A gentleman standing behind my son stepped forward, putting his arm around my son's shoulders, and nodding towards my son, said in a calm and gentle voice to the Iraqi woman, "Lady, hundreds of thousands of men and women like this young man have fought and died so that you could stand here, in MY country and accuse a checkout cashier of bombing your Countrymen. It is my belief that, had you been this outspoken in YOUR OWN country, we wouldn't need to be there today. But, hey! if you have now learned how to speak out so loudly and clearly, I'll gladly pay your way back to Iraq so you can straighten out the mess you are obviously here to avoid." Everyone in line, and within hearing distance, cheered the older Gentleman, coming forward as they reached for their wallets. The woman in the burkha left the store in silence. I am, like at least some that were in the store, outraged! But it also warmed my heart to know that we as Americans are speaking out, calmly and succinctly (finally) to those that enjoy the freedoms here in the US. Hooray for Ann Rea's son, hooray for that checker, hooray for the gentleman in the store for his actions, hooray for Ann Rea for sharing this with all of us. God Bless America and Our Troops!

Origins:   We first encountered this e-mail in April 2003, during the early days of the war in Iraq. Since then it has been passed from inbox to inbox, variously titled "Ann Rea's Son," Rea's Son," and "Letter From A Mom."

In April 2006 a Canadian version (in which the lapel pin was changed to one of the Canadian flag) began circulating — in it, the son in the military that reported the incident to his mother was said to be "still here in Canada" (as opposed to the original e-mail's "still stateside here in California"). July 2007 versions of the Canadian form of the tale changed that to his being stationed in "Ontario," with April 2009 versions altering that to "Ontario, Canada." (Which in itself is a bit strange, in that there are military bases in that province — it would therefore make far more sense to say the lad were stationed at Petawawa, for instance.)

Is it a true story? We don't know. There is little in it that lends itself to independent verification — other than his being identified as "Ann Rea's son" in some tellings, the serviceman is not named (and the question remains open as to whether "Ann Rea" is a first-and-surname combo or a double-barreled given name), and neither his base nor his unit are mentioned. Likewise, none of the other characters in the story have names or are in any other way identifiable; not the patriotic cashier, the burqa-clad woman, or the outspoken older man. Indeed, neither the name of the store nor that of the city where the incident purportedly took place is provided.

Some folks question the e-mail on the basis of its key figure being described as wearing a burqa, a traditional head-to-toe covering worn by many women in Afghanistan — someone from Iraq would be highly unlikely to don such a garment, given that Iraq is a far more secular part of the Muslim world. They correctly point out that in the U.S. a woman clad in such a garment would be a rare sight indeed and that anyone so garbed would be unlikely to be found shopping unaccompanied by her husband or other male relative or to be addressing those she encountered in the outspoken manner attributed to the woman in this story. Yet it is entirely possible the story's author confused one unfamiliar article of clothing for another, describing the woman as clad in a burqa when he meant she was wearing a chador (a quite different kind of robe) or a hijab (a head scarf), the latter commonly worn by Muslim women in the U.S.

In the years since this story first made the rounds, no one has stepped forward to claim authorship of it or to say "Yes, I was that soldier" or "My mother was that cashier" or "I was another customer in the store that day and saw the confrontation." Does this mean the story is fiction? Well, no. The lack of supporting evidence doesn't disprove the account, it just fails to prove it.

However, when evidence to confirm them is lacking, one should strive to remain skeptical of what are presented as real-life accounts that state in narrative form things people are predisposed to believe, especially those tales wherein wrongdoers get their comeuppance through being told off by others. The "ungrateful Iraqi read the riot act over her lack of appreciation for the sacrifices Americans are making for her" is too neat an illustration of a concept held too dearly by too many not to be viewed with a dose of suspicion.

Many Americans regard their country's war with Iraq as a humanitarian effort undertaken to liberate the sorely oppressed Iraqi people from a monster of a leader, and they are therefore angered by a seeming lack of gratitude on the part of those they are rescuing. Because the issue is so clear-cut to them, they find it hard to accept that some Iraqis may continue to be resentful of the coalition forces that invaded their land, bombed their cities, killed some of their citizens, and are still occupying their country. To those Americans who have seen their sons and daughters shipped off to fight this war, it's ludicrous their soldiers are being cold-shouldered by the very folks they're dying for. A story of one such Iraqi being publicly reminded of what's being done for her will resonate quite strongly with those parents (and other Americans), in that such a tale represents a voicing of what many of them would very much like to say.

Barbara "yarns that cause the brows to knit" Mikkelson

Last updated:   18 April 2009

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