Example: [Collected on the Internet, 2001]
This is what's wrong with the world:
1. January 2000: Kathleen Robertson of Austin Texas was awarded $780,000.00 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running amuck inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving tyke was
2. June 1998: A 19 year old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000.00 and medical expenses when his neighbor ran his hand over with a Honda Accord.
3. October 1998: A Terrence Dickson of Bristol Pennsylvania was exiting a house he finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up, because the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't
4. October 1999: Jerry Williams of Little Rock Arkansas was awarded $14,500.00 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's
5. May 2000: A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania $113,500.00 after she slipped on a spilled soft drink and broke her coccyx. The beverage was on the floor because
6. December 1997: Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware successfully sued the owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while
Origins: This "and you wonder what's wrong with the world today?" whinge appeared on the Internet in May 2001. All of the entries in the list are fabrications: a search for news stories about each of these cases failed to turn up anything, as did a search for each law case.
The earliest version concluded with a seventh item that has since been snipped away, likely after someone noticed it was the venerable microwaved poodle legend. Its inclusion would have immediately called into question the truthfulness of the other six cases for any number of folks familiar with urban legends. The remaining six were still false, but they weren't as obviously false as the following poodle tale and thus wouldn't have set the alarm bells ringing:
Mary R. Hogelmen, Esq.
Law Offices of Hogelmen, Hogelmen, and Thomas
Speaking about implied credibility, we note that the "outrageous lawsuits" list has made it into the newspapers at times, which only works to add to the perception
Fake or not, a list of outrageous awards bestowed upon those whose actions — nay, misbehaviors — had brought them to grief would fall upon very receptive ears because current feeling is very much against large jury awards for frivolous claims. This
Numerous states have enacted measures to reform their civil law systems in response to the problem of frivolous lawsuits and runaway jury awards. Tort reform usually amounts to placing a cap on punitive damage awards, making the state's joint-and-several liability law more equitable, and limiting judge and court shopping (which means cases are tried in front of whomever they've been assigned to rather than the judge the plaintiff figures will be most sympathetic).
Though the cases described in the
- In March 1995, a San Diego man unsuccessfully attempted to sue the city and Jack Murphy Stadium for
$5.4 millionover something that can only be described as a wee problem: Robert Glaser claimed the stadium's unisex bathroom policy at a Billy Joel and Elton John concert caused him embarrassment and emotional distress thanks to the sight of a woman using a urinal in front of him. He subsequently tried "six or seven" other bathrooms in the stadium only to find women in all of them. He asserted he "had to hold it in for four hours" because he was too embarrassed to share the public bathrooms with women.
- A San Carlos, California, man sued the Escondido Public Library for
$1.5 million.His dog, a 50-poundLabrador mix, was attacked November 2000 by the library's 12-poundfeline mascot, L.C., (also known as Library Cat). The case was heard in January 2004, with the jury finding for the defendant. In a further case which was resolved in July 2004, the plaintiff in the previous suit was ordered to pay the city $29,362.50, which amounted to 75% of its legal fees associated with that case.
- In 1994, a student at the University of Idaho unsuccessfully sued that institution over his fall from a third-floor dorm window. He'd been mooning other students when the window gave way. It was contended the University failed to provide a safe environment for students or to properly warn them of the dangers inherent to upper-story windows.
- In 1993, McDonald's was unsuccessfully sued over a car accident in New Jersey. While driving, a man who had placed a milkshake between his legs, leaned over to reach into his bag of food and squeezed the milkshake container in the process. When the lid popped off and spilled half the drink in his lap, this driver became distracted and ran into another man's car. That man in turn tried to sue McDonald's for causing the accident, saying the restaurant should have cautioned the man who had hit him against eating while driving.
It can also be argued that the need for tort reform is overblown. Only rarely do ridiculous lawsuits result in windfalls for the plaintiff; these cases are almost always either thrown out or the judgment goes for the defendant. Some celebrated "outrageous" suits wherein judgment went for the plaintiff prove upon closer examination to be far less "outrageous" than originally presented in the media. (For example, the "woman scalded by hot coffee" suit, which at first blush looked like the height of frivolity proved to be a perfectly legitimate action taken against a corporation that knew, thanks to a string of similar scaldings it had quietly been paying off, that its coffee was not just hot, but dangerously hot. The Consumer Attorneys of California provides a good description of
Tort reform thus has both its advocates and its adversaries. On the one hand, we bridle at the thought of the terminally clueless being rewarded for their
It's a complicated issue, one not made any easier to make sense of by lists of fake cases of horrendous miscarriages of justice. One has to wonder why someone is so busy trying to stir up outrage and who or what that outrage would ultimately benefit.
Barbara "herded through the grapevine" Mikkelson
Additional information: George W. Bush's first act upon becoming the Governor of Texas was to reform that state's civil justice system. In January 1995, just after being sworn in, he convened a session of the Legislature to tackle tort reform. Within weeks he signed bills to limit punitive damages to $750,000, cut down on "venue shopping" for favorable judges and juries, and made it easier for judges to impose sanctions on plaintiffs who file frivolous suits.
Sightings: The "woman in a store trips over a toddler, then sues the store" fiction was incorporated into an episode of the television drama Boston Legal ("Tabloid Nation," original air date
Last updated: 11 April 2008
Associated Press. "Men's Room Invasion Prompts Suit." The Fresno Bee. 1 April 1995 (p. F8). Coile, Zachary. "Bush's Formula to Win Over Business." The San Francisco Examiner. 2 October 2000 (p. A1). Elias, Paul. "So What's a Little Litigation Between Friends?" The Recorder. 14 December 1999 (Court Watch; p. 4). Heller, Jonathan. "Man Seeks $1.5 Million from City; Says Library Cat Attacked His Dog." The San Diego Union-Tribune. 5 May 2001 (p. B2). Littlefield, Dana. "Suit Over Library Cat's Attack Bites Back at disabled Dog Owner." The San Diego Union-Tribune. 31 July 2004 (p. NC3). Perkins, Joseph. "We All Pay When Others File Frivolous Lawsuits." The San Diego Union-Tribune. 18 May 2001 (p. B7). Perry, Tony. "A One-Man Campaign for More Women's Restrooms." Los Angeles Times. 18 August 1995 (p. A3). Riffel, James. "Jury Rejects Claims of Disabled Man Against City for Cat Attack." City News Service. 30 January 2004. Vogt, Andrea. "Ludicrous Lawsuit Against University of Idaho Rears Its Ugly Head." Lewiston Morning Tribune. 2 August 1994 (p. A1). New Jersey Lawyer. "Moral of a Burger Suit: Don't Eat and Drive." 15 November 1993 (p. 3). [New York] Daily News. "Mighty Quinn." 25 June 2002 (Sports, p. 63).