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Glurge: Account of a Denver physician who helped a woman in distress.
Example: [Collected on the Internet, 2005]
Origins: We began seeing this account in What 
strikes us about this account is how well the events portrayed therein seem to fit a common panhandling scam we describe in detail in our Distress Cull article: A distressed young woman hits up marks at a gas station, claiming she's run out of gas or that her vehicle has broken down. Usually in such tales, there is mention of a baby sleeping in the car, sometimes even of one urgently needing medicine that had been forgotten at home.
It could be the physician's recounting is an accurate narration of an encounter its writer had with a woman who appeared to be experiencing hardship. (Indeed, we would be surprised if it turned out otherwise.) However, that the benefactor in that tale thought she was helping someone who genuinely needed assistance does not necessarily mean the recipient of her largesse was in the dire straits she appeared to be. One aspect of the account tends to point in that direction: The young mother scrabbling in the snow after a fallen nickel was buying $4.95 worth of fuel at a Denver gas station Since publishing our "Distress Cull" article, a number of this site's readers have written to describe their experiences with "stranger in distress" cons. Here are a few of their stories:
[Collected on the Internet, 2005]
Two of our readers told us about policies their local churches had adopted to both ensure help was made available to those truly in need yet safeguard their congregants' offerings from scam artists playing the 'distressed stranger' game:
My husband and I got taken by a girl named Andrea, (at least that was the name she was using), In downtowne Salt Lake City early last Summer. Around June of 2004. She was trying to raise money for her and her boyfriend to get back to Seattle. She claimed that someone had stolen her purse with their bus tickets and her ID in it, and that her boyfriend was trying to get a temp job with a day labor place to raise money, but they wouldn't take her without ID, and Travlers Aid wouldn't help her for the same reason. My husband and I had come into a slight winfall, (or so we thought), and decided to help her. At first we went to the bus station and tried to buy tickets, but they were having trouble with a poorly trained Clerk at the ticket counter. So we gave her the $160 and wished her luck. The check that we were expecting got lost in the mail and arrived later then expected. So everything that we were counting on it to pay for bounced, and we could not get the charges reversed. So we had to get help from an Uncle to buy groceries. On the way home from the store less then a week later, I saw Andrea playing her scam on another street corner. I don't think that I will ever give a stranger more than five dollors ever again. I hope that Andrea reads this some day, and askes God to forgive her. I can forgive her, eventualy, but others may suffer for her lies, because we're not the only ones she scamed. I opened the door one day to a man who wanted to mow my lawn or other small chores because he needed to pick up money to buy a coffin for his young daughter, who had just died. Unfortunately (for him), I'm very literal-minded, and didn't have any chores. (I never even thought of handing him a $10!) Okay, not a great story, except I worked in a church office for many years. One day a woman came into the office and said that she had brought her ailing father to the doctor and she had no gas money to get back to her home A comment on the "stranger asks for gas money so can go to sick/hurt relative scam". When I lived in Gospel Oak, North London, I answered the door one night to a distressed man saying he lived up the street and needed money because he'd just heard his girlfriend's child had been knocked down by a car and was in hospital some miles away. I gave him a few quid (pounds sterling, to you Americans). Some months later, I answered the door one night to the same distressed man with the same story... I politely told him I couldn't help and shut the door. A couple of months after that, I answered the door one night The first time I ran into the scam was immediately before a church service in a small, rural church I was serving at the time. The organist had already begun playing the introit when a young woman rushed into the church entry, looking quite distressed. Seems that she was desperate to get to her sick cousin's bedside in a town a hundred miles away, but doubted that she had enough gas left to make it to the town just down the road. The easy thing would have been to give her ten or twenty bucks and get on with the church service, but I told her that if she would just wait - or come join us for the service - I would personally drive her to see her cousin immediately after the service, wait for her, and make sure she had enough gas to return home after we got back. Saying she just couldn't wait that long, she quickly departed. Being a bit suspicious, I called several other pastors in the town up the road after church that day. The same young woman had shown up at three of the churches (immediately before services were to begin at all three) and used the same story. At two of them, ushers took up a quick collection for her. I've also been approached in the street a couple of times by people with very similar stories. I'm afraid they got nothing from me This is not a FOAF story. It happened to me.
For those in distress we have come up with a system that works for us. All the churches in Gainesville, Texas has joined an alliance. When someone needs food, gas, housing, etc. we send them to the police station. We call ahead to let the police know they are coming and to give a voucher if cleared. The police do a search and if truely in need give them a voucher, not money, for food, motel, gas etc.
Our desire to believe what we've been told coupled with our urge to perform occasional good deeds leaves us vulnerable to the 'distressed stranger' con. We take folks at face value, which sets us up as pigeons to be taken advantage
My rule became to NEVER give cash, but to do everything in my power to provide whatever other kind of material assistance was requested, and I shared this policy with my parishioners and other pastors. By following this policy, we were able to help many times when people actually did need to have prescriptions purchased, food, gas, rent or utilities paid, etc. We would go to the drugstore with them to purchase the prescription, go to the gas station and pump the gas for them, serve a meal, go to the utility company or landlord and pay bills - but never, ever give anyone a single dime in cash. Naturally, when such an offer of direct aid is made, a number of the people I encountered who claimed they needed help found some reason why it wouldn't work: they were in too much of a hurry, the office/store/pharmacy was closed, etc. In those cases the response was always, "Sorry, but we simply can't give cash. We'll do anything else we can, but we won't give you cash."
When presented with tales of woe and asked for relatively small sums that will help set things to rights, only the very rarest among us will as a matter of course turn down direct appeals for help. The vast majority will hear the unfortunates out, then make their decision to help or not based on the believability of the stories. Given that the con artists working "Stranger in distress" cons are making their livings at churning out one touching tale after another, their The underlying message of the physician's account of her experience at a gas station in Denver is the good of heart should look for opportunities to help their fellow man and when they see them, act upon them. While that is a praiseworthy endeavor to undertake, those so motivated need also consider that the not-so-good of heart are simultaneously out there looking for them. Barbara "help wanted" Mikkelson How To Avoid Falling Victim To 'Distressed Stranger' Scams: These sorts of scam work because the amounts pleaded for are relatively small, and people want to help others, both for the ordinary feel-goodness of it all and as a form of karmic protection against those inevitable days when their cars break down or when they are chagrined to discover they've left their wallets at home. While fraud is sorry repayment for a kind heart and generous nature, the only way to entirely safeguard yourself against falling victim to "stranger in distress" scams is to refuse to help those unknown to you who appear to be in dire straits. Such a course of (non) action will appeal to some but will be heartily eschewed by others who will view the occasional $20 lost on a con artist as but the cost of maintaining a positive view of their fellow man. Therefore, portions of the following advice will apply to some but not to others.
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